Like, Boo, Man

Be safe and have fun, whatever you do. Tonight we open the gates of the TMI offices, turn on the fog machine, and listen to Screaming Jay Hawkins.

And because we like you a whole lot, we're puttin' two treats in your bag. Check it:

It's Halloween o'clock! Artist unknown, or at least uncredited, where we found it. If we figure out who did this orange and black dream, we'll edit accordingly.

Next up is Frank Frazetta's cover art for Creepy magazine, issue no. 7 (published by Warren):

Great googly-moogly! It's a werewolf fighting a Dracula! Our publisher-at-large, S.L. Kreighton brought us this one, and over-shared the following: "I'm pretty sure when I first saw this, I got an erection. Ah, to be nine again."

Now we're really scared.

Fry Your Eyes, Melt Your Brain, Love Your Ears

It's nearly go-time, people. And we know it's been a skint year for genuine reflection, critical examinations, or philosophical pondering from The Typing Monkey. So let us point you to some Halloween treats we frequent:

The Year Of Halloween -- A Tumblr that says what it does and does what it says. This is the Halloween-nut equivalent of finding a roll of quarters outside the arcade. Each post can send you down a rhizomatic path of creepy delights. Go now.

Distinctly Jamaican Sounds -- John, aka Reggaexx is at it AGAIN. Surely the man must dig deeper and deeper in his vaults every year to bring the world custom-made mixes of spooky dub, reggae, ska, rocksteady, and if memory serves, even some lover's rock. Now, we say "dig deeper and deeper" because you'd think he'd run out of material. But no. Every year there are new discoveries, fun sound effects, and even custom artwork. Download piecemeal, or wait for the full set on the 31st. But leave a comment of appreciation no matter what. It's a party soundtrack you didn't have to make, and not a "Monster Mash" in sight.

Graves and Ghouls -- We pointed at this last year when we first discovered it, and it's up and running again this year. Like Year of Halloween above it will show your eyeballs a good time. And, like YoH, there's some mild nudity, so approach with caution if you're at work.

Originally posted on The Weird Wide Web which we would not know about if we hadn't seen it first on The Year of Halloween.

That Ol' Drac Hand

Ultimate source unknown on this one, though we found it via the Weird Tales Facebook feed. It has to be a book cover, VHS sleeve or movie poster. And if there's more too the image, we don't want to see.

The simple image of the vampire's hand, a French cuff, the scarlet interior of the casket planting the idea of blood in the viewer's mind -- it delivers a slow, but steadily unfolding fear. Awake now, the Count will rise and disappear into the night, hungry.

Alas, Poor Yorick

From the most wonderful Mike Mignola:

Squash

We may snicker when a teen in Hot Topic goth gear waxes philosophic on the beauty of decay, but reader, that teen is on to something.

In popular depictions, the crackle of autumn leaves and the twilight passage of migrating birds hog the cozy glow of October. But it's the slowing pulse of nature getting comfortable in her sleep that moves the pens of poets. Clouds nudge closer for warmth and the scurrying feet of insects send Morse code to the soil: Good night and thank you for everything you've done. Now rest.

Shh.

Lean in close to carnival mouth of the jack-o'-lantern. His turnip breath exhales a whisper: None of us were meant to last.

halloween pumpkins 2014 from Thomas Vespermann on Vimeo.

If you'd like to see another slightly creepy time lapse video from Thomas Vespermann, check out "Vintage Flower Dolls."

Look Behind You!

If you followed our headline and actually saw something scary, that's pretty cool. But you probably saw curtains, or the back of the couch ... maybe a coworker. Either way, we've made it to the end of the 2013 Halloween Frenzy. Whew!

We hope it was good for you. Have fun today and be safe tonight. Remember to check under the bed.

Here's a Silly Symphony from 1929 called Hells Bells. Based on slightly foggy memories of a couple biographies we read more than a decade ago, the whole 'toon was likely designed and plotted by Ub Iwerks, the nearly invisible hand that guided Disney's formative years as an animation studio.


[courtesy of Pat Hawkins]

And at no extra charge, have a laugh at Hark! A Vagrant's newest, a Halloween themed set of one-strip gags based on antique postcards. "Bewitching Halloween" is a riot.

Does a Ghost Dig the One Drop?

Way back in October 2009 we suggested you navigate over to the blog Distinctly Jamaican Sounds for the annual Halloween Spooktacular.

Kids, we're here to remind you that it's going on again. Blogger John, aka Reggaexx, pulls from his collection a couple dozen of the most choice reggae, dub, dancehall, ska, rocksteady, and even lovers rock singles that have even a gossamer connection to Halloween and horror.

Throughout the month, he puts the songs up for download. But it's not just the songs, he cuts in a some sound effects and bits of dialogue and trailer narration from horror movies to crank the Spooktacular aspect of his efforts as high as the can go.

Plus he makes killer artwork to accompany each tune. And if you're a lazy bum, he strings them all together into one massive download at the end of the month. Having a party? Press play on these cuts and you've got the music taken care of.

So Much to See

Sometimes we see blogs, Tumblrs and other stops on the web and wonder why we even bother. Then we remember, we bother because if we weren't here to pass the links on to you, who would?

At least that's what we tell ourselves at night before drinking enough cough syrup to fall asleep while listening to old radio dramas.

Imagine some sort of brass fanfare here. Now look!

Can you even stand it?! Yeah, exclamation points. Journalism-degree-be-damned. If ever there was a still from a Disney cartoon that merited a freak-out, this certainly makes the grade.

This is just a smoked pepper corn amongst the bounty of spicy offerings at the Graves and Ghouls Tumblr.

It's run by a woman named Cat who has another Tumblr worth your time, Vintage Gal.

There are GIFs on both, which tend to bug our wonky eyes, but that's one broken match in the factory full of joy. And please know there are ladies in various states of undress on both blogs, so don't get fired on our watch, okay?

Monsters All the Time

Need near-daily doses of hideous horrors, creeping corpses and fantastic phantasms? [Who wrote this, Stan Lee? -- ed]

Get thee to Monster Crazy and Monster Brains.

Yeah, we talk about both blogs a lot, and link to them in the Monkey Love section. But that's because they are excellent portals to art both high and low, and all of it geared toward monsters. What are you even still doing here reading this?

Oh fine, here's a sample of one of many great things you'll see at Monster Crazy:

Now get going.

It's the No. 1 Drink for Astronaut Draculas the World Over

Thanks Lost Wackys!

Sebastian's Voodoo

Joaquin Baldwin made this animated short in 2009, and it's presented here by the National Film Board of Canada. The Paraguay native now works for Disney. Let's hope the mouse doesn't squeeze the creativity from him.

Now, for our feature presentation:

Look Out, Kids! (Ohio Edition)

This sounds like the start of a solid neighborhood legend. Allegedly, a van full of people dressed as zombies are terrorizing teens Gahanna and Worthington, two communities in Ohio.

None of these "zombie attacks" have been corroborated by authorities, but we're guessing the retelling of any possible encounters are already attaining folklore status on playgrounds and in living rooms all over central Ohio.

Thing is, we can't decide if the zombie gag is mean or really fun(ny).

Ain't Got No Head

Two very different takes on the Headless Horseman of The Legend of Sleepy Hollow.

First, Frank Frazetta:

That man could draw horses like few others. For real. You know why Maurice Sendak decided to use monsters in Where the Wild Things Are instead of his original plan for horses? Because he realized how hard it is to draw horses.

Second is Kate Beaton's knee-slapping script-flip of Ichabod on the run:

Read the short strip here.



[A doff of the Jack O'Lantern to Weird Tales for the Frazetta art.]

A Challenge

First, we remind you of the annual Countdown to Halloween, an aggregation of blogs that go bug-nuts with Halloween-related content all October long. You could lose your job, grow a beard, and get fat with ramen and cheap beer all because you spent your days exploring what the Countdown has to offer. Crucial. Stuff.

Second, our search continues for Ghost Dots. Any size will do, but especially the bag of fun-size boxes. The past two years have resulted in zero Ghost Dots at TMI HQ. Zero.

Reader, that is unacceptable. So if you find a store that stocks them in the Seattle area, drop us a message: typingmonkey AT live.com and let us know where you found them. Perhaps we'll send you a CD or .zip file of fun Halloween music as a thank you.

An office without Ghost Dots is no office at all.

What're We Having?

Everybody's in a lather about pumpkin-spice/pumpkin-flavored things. We like actual pumpkin quite a lot, both savory and sweet. And we'll even entertain a pumpkin-infused coffee beverage now and then because, why not? We got nothing to prove.

However, there's more than one "flavor of autumn" and tasty fresh apples are part of that array. Fall is also a time for bourbon. So if pumpkin can be attached to all manner of food and drink in the name of seasonal spirit, why not apple?

Thus, we created a new cocktail that everyone at The Typing Monkey office has been enjoying. We're calling it Betty's Little Helper, in reference to and reverence for both Ms. Crocker and apple brown betty. Here's the recipe so you can mix one up for yourself:

Betty's Little Helper
1.5 oz bourbon
1.5 oz spiced apple cider, chilled
Club soda, chilled

In a 6 to 8 ounce tumbler, pour the bourbon and cider in together, then top it off with club soda. Don't bother with a top-shelf whisky. Buffalo Trace was what we had, and it's good for blending. Any mid-level sipper does the trick.

You'll want to go nuts with the cider though and get something quality. R.W. Knudsen Cider & Spice* is our favorite, as it's 100 percent juice and isn't overly sweet. The spice levels in Knudsen's brew are well balanced too -- a glass of the juice on its own tastes like a slice of homemade apple pie.

We put the bourbon in the freezer for an hour to make sure it was corpse-cold, but that's a personal preference. The club soda dials down the bourbon's bite and relaxes the cider's sweetness. Plus, the bubbles tickle our nose.

If fancy is your goal, add a cinnamon stick for garnish. And though we haven't tried it, a splash of Tuaca would make a Betty's Little Helper a la Mode. Scumps!



*Knudsen's label says their cider is "Prepared in the New England Tradition." We don't know what that entails so we'll just imagine it involves barrel presses and John Forsythe standing around in a sweater-vest, flirting with Shirley MacLaine.

French-Goth-Surf-Pop

The French band La Femme has a decidedly surf- and noir-influenced sound, with just the right shades of psychedelia, ye-ye, and first-generation goth (Banshees, Bauhaus, Specimen).

And lucky for us, they made a long-form video for their song "Hypsoline." A long form video. That's so ... Duran Duran.

The film creeps around as if a loose adaptation of an M.R. James or J. Sheridan Le Fanu story, finally wrapping around to a nightmare party that we'd still happily attend. (French girls!)

It's lightly spooky and a great exercise in matching song to visuals. Here, drink this ...

Halloween on the Street: Learning Shapes

We'll start with something light and kid friendly:

Nice, eh? It was done by Jack Davis for Sesame Street Magazine. Davis did cartoon art and illustrations for many print advertisements as well as magazine illustrations, most notably for EC and Mad. He also did a fair amount of movie posters and contributed character design work for the Rankin and Bass animation team.

Thank Mr. Davis for the excellent look of the creeps and heroes in the forever excellent Mad Monster Party.

And if you like fun, and really, who doesn't? Visit Sam Henderson's Magic Whistle Tumblr for more great finds and absurd humor.

O is for October

O is also for "oh."

As in: "Mom, do you think the United States will crumble under the weight of its own stupidity?"
"Oh, probably."

Things are getting scary. Also, Halloween will soon be upon us and as our regular reader knows, that means the arrival of this, our 6th annual Typing Monkey Halloween Frenzy.

We'll do our best during the next four weeks to show you cool pictures, videos, links to good reads and other fun stuff. ("Uh, how is different from what you normally do?") Because it will all be Halloween themed stuff, that's how. Geez!

Get yourself a cup of something, grab a donut, and enjoy this mash-up from Go Home Productions, still the best mash-up DJ around. He made a video for this one, and it's gone from his YouTube channel, but some enterprising young person called kliz9 posted it again.


Hurry! You'll miss your bus!

Too Soon

Our new intern, Kim (a boy ... named Kim!) returned two weeks ago from a trip to buy office supplies [hard cider, potato chips and chocolate-covered almonds are going in the office supply budget now? -- ed.] and returned to TMI headquarters visibly upset.

Initially we were unwilling to take the bait from this millennial kid who knows what a Tumblr is and has feelings and stuff. But his blue mood started to infect the rest of us.

It turns out, Kim was a great addition to The Typing Monkey because the source of his melancholy was the fact that two of the stores he visited already had Halloween decorations available for purchase. The date was Aug 3.

"It was a small display but it was there -- orange candles, plastic autumn leaves and Jack-o-lantern decorations," Kim sighed.

Our regular reader knows how deeply The Typing Monkey loves Halloween. It is the best holiday Western Civilization has ever devised. FACT.

But it's still summer. At the time of this posting, Labor Day is more than two weeks away. Back to school sales are still going strong, and if retail giants are willing to start displaying Halloween items in mid-August, then the dreaded Christmas onslaught will come even sooner.

Sorry, Thanksgiving, you've become the Jan Brady of major holidays.

To paraphrase The Byrds and the bible, there's a time to carve pumpkins and a time to do many other things that aren't carving pumpkins.

But commerce cannot be stopped. This is how we live now.


Photo by 1966 United Feature Syndicate  – © 1966 United Feature Syndicate Inc. All rights reserved.

Quiz Time: Facial Expressions & Literature

Look at these pictures of Ray Bradbury:

The black and white image was taken in 1938, when the writer was a senior at high school in Waukegan, Illinois.

The color image was snapped in 1975 after he'd already published Farenheit 451, Something Wicked This Way Comes, and The Halloween Tree.

One of these men can stare deep into the very core of your emotional brain and memories of childhood. He can mold your sensations like a sculptor with clay, causing you to feel weird surges of sweetness and regret, triggering great joy and exhilaration, suspense and fear, conjuring melancholy you want to wrap around yourself like a blanket against the cold.

Which of these men can do this?

[To see the answer, select this text: Dude, they're both Ray Bradbury. He is a crafty genius and you should read one of his stories as soon as you can.]