Can We Stay at Grandma's?

Perhaps you've heard of Darlene Mayes, the so-called "Ganja Granny." According to news reports, the 73-year-old ran a four-state marijuana distribution operation from her rural Oklahoma home. And in case it's unclear, what she did is monumentally illegal.

Thing is, stories like Mayes' are becoming about as common as dime bags at a Foghat show.

A simple Web search on "ganja granny" turns up three other senior women who've earned the title. And the past five-plus years have seen news stories about elderly citizens in the United States turning to dealing controlled substances, frequently to simply pay the bills, but sometimes because they use the product -- most often marijuana -- themselves.

While the reports of Mayes' case don't specify if she was a smoker, there was paraphernalia in her home. However that's not really why we post this story.

The take-away for all of us at The Typing Monkey has been the big bag of questions and considerations the Ganja Granny case provokes.

There are multiple reports that as Baby Boomers age, they're turning toward controlled substances they may've enjoyed during their youth. Pain pills are common, yes, but marijuana use among their demographic is on the rise.

And having enough money to live a reasonable life after retirement age is a growing concern as well. There are only so many senior citizens willing and able to serve up smiles and fast food. Clearly the pot trade doesn't discriminate based on age.

Will Boomers final er, contribution to our culture be a push for the legalization of marijuana? Their numbers are legion and if past generations are any indication, soon they'll have nothing but time and the feisty anger of the old.

What Time Is It?

The March 12, 2012 issue of The New Yorker contains a feature on artist Christian Marclay's incredible video montage project "The Clock." The creation of the work took three years of modified crowd-sourcing of films, editing, editing, and more editing and one moment of brilliant inspiration.

That inspiration: What if there was a film made of existing footage depicting clocks, edited in such a way that the film unspools in real time for a full 24 hours?

If you live in one of the five lucky cities to have hosted this work, The Typing Monkey envies you. Read the whole story here, and watch this bootleg-ish video clip of three minutes worth of the film:


[Courtesy of HLGFilms]

We'll be right back after these messages ...

F-R-E-S-H! Fresh fresh fresh that's fresh!


[Courtesy of Stonesthrow]

500 "Lost" Fairytales Discovered -- Countless New Band Names to Come

A volume of notes and writings by Bavarian historian Franz Xaver von Schönwerth has revealed a bounty of forgotten or otherwise unknown fairytales from Europe.

Schönwerth, a contemporary of the Grimm brothers, collected numerous tales that are either distinct variants on existing stories, or entirely new stories with titles such as "King Golden Hair" and "The Turnip Princess." And perhaps this description of what might be our favorite: "the tale of a maiden who escapes a witch by transforming herself into a pond."

Psychedelic, metal and hip-hop musicians: Please start scooping these up for band names, album/song titles, MC monikers, and rich source material for lyrics and concept records. It's imperative you do this soon before the next generation of Decembrists knock-offs gets a hold of it.

The Guardian has more details about this incredible find.


[tip o' the wizard cap to The Fortean Times]

Spoiler Alert!

Wanna watch the first four minutes of the "Nazis fled Earth after WWII and settled on the dark side of the Moon and are launching an invasion of Earth in 2018" movie Iron Sky?

Yes you do:



The film began production in 2006, and much of the funding was done via the new-ish business model for filmmakers: seeking financing via the Web.

As a result of that long, open-source-type production, they've had time to alter the script to include a character clearly meant to be Sarah Palin. No, she's not one of the invading Moon SS, she's the U.S. president. It's an obvious/dated joke made fresh by the lunar lander banner reading "Yes She Can!"

Will Iron Sky make Palin a cinematic heroine? Or will space Nazis win? I bet the screenwriters wish they had time to include Newt Gingrich, who Palin endorses.

Enough. It's a black comedy involving helium-3 mines, space-traveling zeppelins, and creepy Aryan youth barking "We come in peace!" Iron Sky even has Udo Kier. How can this not be excellent, even if it's terrible?

See the theatrical trailer here.

[Thanks again to Bleeding Cool.]

Fond of Cigarettes

Heh heh. Click and enjoy this Victorian illustration about uppity dames, brought to our attention by Hark! A Vagrant on Tumblr.

Monkey Love: Science Monster

One of the first Websites we linked to after the launch of The Typing Monkey was the magnificent Science Monster.

As Ray Bolger sang in the Scotch Buy jingle:  "'Tain't fancy but it sure is good."

If you go to the site it seems so low-tech, positively Unix. That's because chief Monster Scientist, Mark Assaf, didn't waste time making a site that's fun to look at. He focused his effort on filling Science Monster with links to download-ready public domain movies, old radio shows and even some music.

Need to watch the 1958 black and white goof Teenage Zombies right now? Done, son.  [It's a "horror" film so tame it plays as if it was funded by the Lutheran Church. -- ed.] And yes, Assaf is selling a fair bit of his catalog too -- 16 mm prints if you're into that sort of thing.

Assaf says his download content, the films especially, are ideal for those bored days at work when there's little else to do but watch a rickety old monster movie compressed and digitized to fit on either a portable device or a small video window on your PC. Don't get fired on our account.


Thank Science Monster, not us. He's doing the Lord's work.